Sunday, June 6, 2010

The Adoption Option

Adoption has changed our lives and the lives of so many around us. We have friends who have adopted from Taiwan, Uganda, Ethiopia, Russia, South Korea, Vietnam, Guatemala, and the USA. Growing up in a small town, I had not heard too much about adoption. I knew two people at my school who were adopted, one domestic and one Korean. After seeing how both adopted children treated their parents, I decided adoption would not be an option for me. (insert chuckles here) Of course, like so many other things, God would change my heart.

Addie and I were talking the other day about Bulgaria, and she said she wanted to go there for another sibling. My Grandma heard her and said, "You don't NEED any more kids." As she said it, I realized she does not get it like so many. I politely explained, it's not about what I need, it's about what a child on the other side of the world growing up without a family needs. You see it's not about me. It never was. It's the Lord's story, and we can choose to tell it through our lives or live for ourselves. We have fooled ourselves into a comfortable life, and decided what we can afford and what we can handle. I am more guilty than most. I had hardened my heart for adoption until one of my dearest friends from college adopted two beautiful boys from Mercy Ministries. Now, I have felt God's hand and His leading so strongly through this process, that I want everyone to experience it!

There is a song called "Albertine" by Brook Fraser. The song has a line which has haunted me for a long time. It says, "Now that I have seen, I am responsible." Once God removes the scales from your eyes and shows you something, it's impossible to not be changed. God has shown us orphanages, faces of beautiful children who may never call anyone "Mom" or "Dad." We have seen the poverty, the despair, and the sadness and hopelessness in their eyes. It breaks my heart to know some children will never find a family. It reminds me of the story of the Good Samaritan. "Godly" and "Righteous" people saw the man beaten and battered and passed by on the other side. It was only the Samaritan who saw and DID something! I've talked to many of our friends who have adopted, and the hardships in adoption we have all faced. The one common thread is the hand of God, and feeling His presence. We would all do it all over again.

We went to an adoption conference while we were looking at different agencies and we heard a woman speak. Her words were burned into my heart. She had four biological children, and had adopted 3 more from China. Her biological children were in their late 20s and her adopted children were in their teens. The Mom and the oldest daughter went on a mission trip to China to work in an orphanage. They met a special needs 5 year old girl, and they fell in love with her. They knew she would have a very difficult time being chosen. On the plane ride home, the older daughter said to the Mom, "you know we have to go get her right?" The Mom said, " I already have 7 children! Besides, I'm TOO OLD!" The daughter looked at her mom and said, "What do you think she'd rather have, old Mom or NO Mom?" Wow. They went back and adopted her.

I don't know if the Lord will lead us to adopt again and go to Bulgaria. I only know I am changed and so thankful for the journey.

"And whoever welcomes a little child like this in My name welcomes Me." Matthew 18:5